Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Randomize
