I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
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