i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
