i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
