the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
He just walked in on me naked with a beer in my hand eating a calzone in bed. If he wasn't in love with me before...
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize