so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
Randomize
