Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
Randomize
