I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Did i mention i'm like the equivilent of a prepubescent boy suffering from preejaculacy? I just about creamed my pants when he grabbed my hand..
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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