ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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