let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Do you think wearing a shirt that says I like penis is too much for tonight?
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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