You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
