I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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