i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's a scientific achievement that I can make jelly that is 95% vodka so suck it up.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize