I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
I'm going to preface tonight by saying that I'm sorry for tequila, shopping carts, and having to chase me.
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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