i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
His rebound girl is half his size, looks like a leprechaun, is majoring in theater studies and has arms like Rosie O'donnell. Do I win?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
