YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont even know how to be here
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah. He can't come because his mom found the pizza box under his bed with my underwear in it. He acted confused, guess because i forgot to tell him..
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
i now understand why vodka
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
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