Umm I'm too high to move.
Heybabeimwearingurpanties
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Help me. My dealer just asked me to have a child with him. Sat me down for a heart to heart "he's almost 40 and losing his shit cause he's single and wants babies" talk. How the fuck am I supposed to feel about this????
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
May the power of my ass compel you!!
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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