Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
