I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
Can I crash on your couch? I just came home to find my wife giving two guys blowjobs.
Two?
Two.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Randomize
