i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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