ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
Randomize
