Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Two grown ass men just come into the bar riding humongous tricyles
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
