Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
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