Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
Randomize
