READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Randomize
