it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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