he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Just had to stop myself from doing a bump on the Disney bus. The struggle is real.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
