its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
