So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
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