I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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