I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Randomize
