Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
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