OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Randomize
