I feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear.
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
