That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
