This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Just got gas in my car for the first time while high. Went better than expected.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
