Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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