my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Randomize
