so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
