I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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