So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Randomize
