Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Where is the hickey?
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
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