I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize
