He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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