Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
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