Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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