guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
