So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes