that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.