Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...