I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
